Billy Club
@BillyFuckinClub
Of course your opinion matters … just not to me
Sorry about all the mean shit I said when I was right
Calm down Chad. I’ve had an ingrown hair go deeper than my feelings for you
In alcohol’s defence, I’ve done some equally stupid things while completely sober.
Super excited about a brand new week of questionable life choices
I always knew America would be punished for inventing reality TV.
Guys are so awesome for those first 3 weeks and then their warranty expires
Nothing like spending 30 minutes of your morning trying to recreate a fart sound your chair made to prove to your coworkers it wasn't you
don't flirt with me because i’m gonna flirt back then ghost you
we can’t be friends unless you can win jenga using just your butt cheeks
I wish saying “Not it” carried the same weight as an adult as it did when I was a kid
Cyndi Lauper should release a new song called Moms Just Want to Sleep In.
i’m two wine coolers away from setting down my shovel & abandoning this giant hole i dug in my backyard.
People who leave the blinds closed the entire plane ride: who hurt you?
I saw a Brazilian woman coming out of a Brazilian wax establishment and my OCD was utterly delighted.
Kids today will never know the amusement of breaking an old thermometer, pouring the mercury in your hand and nvgrd vxzdr mmyu bvfryj
From now on when people send me acronyms, I’m not responding until they type that shit out.