Mr.Carter

Why in the fuck are cereal bags not ziplock yet?

You can have all the money in the world and will never find this kind of love and happiness.

Oh your dick is your pinned tweet, how original.

I’m either perfectly content with my life or I’m a sociopath and I don’t really care either way.

Knowing better has never been the problem.

I need to fix my entire life. A long weekend should give me enough time, right?

bitch i know you feel me thinking about you

Welcome to X you're screwed

My terrible twos really set the tone for the rest of my life

Time to fuel the this insatiable beast 😋

A lobotomy is starting to sound pretty relaxing.

Babe’s idea of foreplay is getting takeout from Applebees.

Who needs therapy when there's pulling weeds in my garden

In case nobody reminded you today, I'm beautiful. Goodnight from gods country 🫶

No one is as confident that I didn’t say something, as my husband who is discovering on his own the exact thing I just said.

I think a lot about feelings... just mine though, never yours.

nothing but sighs and sleepy eyes

It’s chicken casserole night. Tell your son to be over by 5.

People who are fully clothed at the beach; why.

It probably means nothing.

Hello all, I’m not ignoring anyone. I’m just not feeling well. Xoxo.