Bird Eckler
@Birdeckler
They should make a moral fiber supplement
Of course I wrote a grocery list. I carefully wrote it all down and then didn’t bring it with me, like my mother and her mother before her.
Friend: “I need some advice.” Me, (almost dropping my phone and then fumbling it across the room): “You’ve come to the right person.”
you be fighting for your life financially then all your toiletries run out at the same time
“I’m still a bad bitch,” I tell myself while skimming through the perennials catalog I brought from home while watching my kids’ swimming lessons.
What if I broke into your house and started petting your dogs and cats tf u gonna do about it
The coffee place I go to serves their cortados in a tiny cup that I find humiliating to walk around with, so when I order it I ask for a regular cup, and then when it’s ready, they call out, “Cortado in a big cup!” which is also humiliating.
I spent the last 8 hours in the air watching older movies and I have to say, the difference between them and modern films is intense. They didn’t have the technology but those films feel so alive and have so much depth from the sets to the characters to the actors looking real.
Having a disorder is not an excuse to dictate how other people act or react.
thoughts on mental health that would have you like this?
As an 80s kid, the fact that I haven’t had at least one talking animal sidekick at this point, is frankly outrageous.
this sentence was never meant to be said
A Labubu was left on Karl Marx’s grave.
there are sentences being created that have never been created before
Hulk Hogan watching the Trisha Paytas reincarnation portal close behind Ozzy
in trouble with the wife for referring to the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders as "well-oiled machines"
(watching everything i desperately held close get ripped from my hands and turned to dust by time) ah jeez
I have a good friend who’s an ultra smart sailing guy. Captain of his own ship, great job, 6’2. Maybe a touch obsessed with taking revenge on a whale who happens to be a metaphor for the futility of human ambition but a good dude. Legit cannot find a gf. Feel for him.
sean kingston waking up one day in 2007:
Too many beautiful women in this city. I gotta die
lost my birth certificate I'm officially a freelance child if anybody is feeling adopty
Streaming service: I see you paused your show with 3 minutes left, would be a shame if someone were to...restart it from the beginning
Oh only a single scoop with hot fudge for me please because my health