John H. Beers III 🐀
@Bedlam_Beersie
Weird little guy who got big. Two horses in a man costume. CR 5 threat for low-level adventures. Avi by @popartcartoonz
Current mood: Trying to think of different D&D situations to go with various MacGruber gifs. For example: [when you keep messing up your attack rolls]
People keep asking James Gunn about canon. “Is Peacemaker canon?” “Is Aquaman canon?” Nobody is asking about THE quintessential superhero movie. What I want to know: Is Steel starring Shaq canon?
And to think just last week he was playing Superman
It’s hot and humid in Minnesota. Is ‘corn sweat’ to blame? startribune.com/corn-sweat-hea…
People think a post is “successful” if it gets a lot of likes but personally I think a post is successful if it reaches just one person and absolutely ruins their day
The ultimate weapon for Thor would be a bag of Mjolnirs. “‘Dumb as a bag of hammers,’ they said, but I thought that sounded like a pretty good idea.”
I’m going to put an unexpected item in your bagging area.
We're giving away a set of our new @youtooz Plushes! Like, comment, and retweet for a chance to win
I don’t have a nemesis. But if I did, and that nemesis outlived me, I would love for them to show up to my funeral and say “Make sure you bury him face down so he can see Hell.”
no way they found waluigi mangione
Where the fuck is Jubilee finding these guys
If you take enough Benadryl, this guy shows up at the foot of your bed
Cmon lmao
don’t surround yourself with yourself bro. surround yourself with hotdogs
Who’s the anesthesiologist, Leland Palmer?
Losing it over this therapy horse that vigorously plays the piano to wake kids up from anesthesia
You know how time is of the essence when it comes to organ viability for organ donations? Well that’s a thing of the past thanks to my new autonomous surgical drones! What could possibly go horribly wrong with self-guiding flying scalpels hell-bent on retrieving organs?!
The people in this workplace harassment training video really do work in the worst friggin’ office.
I found out my wife was cheating on me at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert and I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.
The sales pitch for military robots designed to look like native desert fauna was going well, but they threw me out of the building when I called it “camel-flage.”
Forgetting where you parked your car is a good way to get your steps in.