Cabo 🍳🇺🇸

I have my people. You have your people. Fuck you and your people.

The masculine initiates and leads. The feminine reciprocates and follows.

WTF?? Hulk Hogan passed away?? I’m not sad, I’m PISSED

Man, some day Hulk Hogan is gonna die and that bums me out rn.

What is actually wrong with these people?

I promise to have your mom home by curfew.

Perhaps the Kinks said it best.. "I know what I am, and I am a man, AND SO IS LOLA."

Just Ended The Season, again. x.com/i/trending/194…

You want to know why us Gen X’ers rarely get sick? Don’t have weird allergies, and will outlast most of you?

Life is hard wear a helmet

Remember those days you thought would never end? Well I’m here to tell you that collectively they all got together and said fuck you.

You were playing hide and seek, but no one found you, which gave you time to read.

If only you could see how mentally ill you are.

Update. Jessie‘s girl is now the mother to Sarah and Dakota. Thrice divorced, in full-blown menopause and hates all men.

I already knew Uranus was emitting a lot of heat, cuz your ass is smoking. Anyway… I’m back in HR.

He who tries will be wasted. More at 11.

That Jolly Roger dude was a bit of a prick if you ask me.

The real trick is to outlive Keith Richards.

Come on guys, If you can’t believe the obscenity laced ramblings of a meth addict, crack fiend, then who can you believe.

For those of you who thought the Smurfs weren't annoying enough, Rihanna is voicing Smurfette in the new Smurfs reboot.