Jack Boot
@IamJackBoot
The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, The Atlantic, Harper's, Rolling Stone. I've read some of these magazines.
The time my bongos caught fire. It was terrible. No one would help and the more frantically I tried to put them out the louder everyone cheered.
Trump loyalists are starting to say Ghislaine Maxwell was just another innocent victim caught up in everything. It's a lie. They are just laying the groundwork for a pardon deal from Trump in exchange for her silence.
I started calling all my coworkers “chef” so I don’t have to remember their names, and no, we don’t work in a restaurant.
“One time I belched so long and loud I got the entire alphabet out and an ambulance showed up.” Interviewer: And a weakness?
That fucked up moment when your friend is getting bitched out by his wife so you just sit there petting their dog.
When you split a dessert the waiter should bring two forks and one of those chess clocks you smack to let the other person know it’s their turn.
If you missed it, this is the full list of Democratic operatives that Trump says created the so-called Epstein files "hoax":
When driving by a pretty woman and she looks at me— 25 y/o me: Woah, she’s checking me out! 60 y/o me: What’s she looking at? Is my car on fire? Did I run over another pedestrian?
It would be great to have a press secretary who could answer any question without mentioning Joe Biden.
I'm a unifying spirit. I can't be on your team.
What's the problem? If the list comes out and Trump is on it, MAGA will just change their standards. They're very flexible people.
Of course, there is an Epstein client list, and of course, it includes both Republicans and Democrats and other powerful and influential people. It's hilarious that MAGA really thought Trump would release it, and it would only be a list of their least favorite Democrats. Morons.
Of course, there is an Epstein client list, and of course, it includes both Republicans and Democrats and other powerful and influential people. It's hilarious that MAGA really thought Trump would release it, and it would only be a list of their least favorite Democrats. Morons.
As far as I can tell Jake Paul is neither Mexican nor an illegal. But we should deport him anyway.
They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.
Jewish space lasers and now weather control machines? What is the darling girl taking, and where can I get some? I want to join her in that boat on a river with tangerine trees and marmalade skies.
I am introducing a bill that prohibits the injection, release, or dispersion of chemicals or substances into the atmosphere for the express purpose of altering weather, temperature, climate, or sunlight intensity. It will be a felony offense. I have been researching weather…
Thank Jesus. Someone is finally standing up to Blofeld and his dastardly weather control machine.
I am introducing a bill that prohibits the injection, release, or dispersion of chemicals or substances into the atmosphere for the express purpose of altering weather, temperature, climate, or sunlight intensity. It will be a felony offense. I have been researching weather…
Four Canadian skeletons in four Canadian cars at a four-way stop.
My go bag has twenty-dollars in Buffalo nickels, a warm Sunny D, and an autographed 8x10 of fat Axl Rose.
FDR should be our north star. He was a class traitor. God bless him.
We have a Democratic establishment that has spent two plus decades filling their pockets with money from the donner class and they can't recognize a genuine liberal when they see one. Zohran Mamdani looks like Bigfoot to them. They have lost the plot. Zohran is the party of FDR.