MA!NG!

Isn't it funny how seamlessly life moves from dreams to survival? Each one of you had dreams. Paying rent was not where it was supposed to end.

😎

Just sent off an email saying warmest “retards” instead of “regards”

If it’s 100 by 100 then why is it rectangle

Idk who needs to hear this, but we already have Trillionaires. You're just not going to find them in Forbes.

"Confirm you're not a robot." Why would a robot search for Mia Khalifa??😭😂

Entered into a shoe design competition. Someone joked that I should make a ‘Kamba’ shoe for vibes. I sketched a bold yellow & black sneaker. Named it Blossm. Next thing, I was on a plane to Prague for a Fashion weekend. It won a global award and sold out in Bata stores worldwide

Hiyo side mnaona tick ya blue? I just like my account verified 🙂

I just did some research and found out that most tribes in Kenya used to practice cannibalism like it's a normal thing. Were it not for civilisation,mimi kama firstborn singewahi exist. It's sad that to-date some countries still practice it.

Job applications be like “how did u hear about us?” bro why, was it a secret?

Nimeenda kuunda FPL squad, bado hawajaeka my favourite players na mshaunda ligi.

Mango is literally the best fruit to ever exist

How I expect Tems to hold me after buying that ticket

Study shows that Marijuana use lowers the brain activation in areas responsible for memory , attention and decision making. Yes, that's the whole point coz they want the activity in their brain to be lower so they can just chill.

Mimi na roomy tumefika ile stage ya kupiga story mmoja akiwa amekalia choo ilhali mwingine anabrush meno. Hiyo ni level gani ya mapenzi?

Safaricom be like: Oh, you like this cheap bundle? Next time we'll hide it from the main page. Oh, you found it after multiple menus? Guess what, it now costs 10 bob extra. Oh, you paid for it 3 times after the price hike? Fuck you, the bundle no longer exists on offer for you.

Humble brag…They won’t believe a little girl from Kenya built the orchestration engine for this, but I did!

Crashing out kidogo nishajiingiza kwa maisha ya madeni 😭. Sijui ukishazoea loan life hakuna way back ama ni addiction.

A friend I'd not spoken to in almost 4 years called. We talked & laughed for over 30 minutes. Said we needed to grab a meal soon. Then towards the end he asked; "Before I forget... how did you get over your heartbreak back then?" That's how I discovered he was getting divorced.

The fact that he’s read “pause for a moment”

🚨 Once again: Alexander Isak wants Liverpool, it’s his priority as reported. No talks with Al Hilal, Chelsea or Manchester United. ❌