Jonathan Edward Durham
@thisone0verhere
Writer of Speculative Literary Fiction • Generalized Anxiety Wunderkind • Already Sorry • Sneaker Addict •🐰👀🌾 Author of “Winterset Hollow” 🌾👀🐰•
••🐰🌾 WINTERSET HOLLOW 🌾🐰•• The breakout #DarkFantasy sensation that will leave you breathless! It’s Barley Day on Addington Isle…and you’re invited to the hunt! 🐰🐸🦊🐻 Available in paperback and E-BOOK! #SFF #fantasybooks #KindleBooks
Petition to serve pickles with more food than just sandwiches. Pizza? Soup? Salad? Tacos? Bbq? Why are we gatekeeping our own joy like this?!
Don’t invite me to your Super Bowl party unless this is the vibe
They should let you electronically eavesdrop on other tables at restaurants but the more you listen to another table the more of their tab you have to pay
me: babe. Babe. BAAAABE!!! husband: omg WHAT?! me: the dog is doing something cute 👉👈
Honestly I don’t wanna see *one* more new podcast until these guys have one
Now that we’ve all had a month to digest the year, I want you all to stop and think about whether you really want to throw an April Fool’s Day into this mix
Pro tip: if you don’t check your mail often enough, you get to spend a little chunk of January 24th standing in your kitchen feeling the light inside you die a little with each Christmas card you open
Cream cheese on my steering wheel but same
I have accidentally spilled an entire jar of marmalade inside my hat.
We have a souvenir flag from Medieval Times that we keep inside our front door, and if one of us is having a bad day, we put it at half-staff when we get home, that way the other knows as soon as *they* get home and can adjust accordingly and this is a very good system indeed
When my social battery runs out seven minutes into the function
When I’ve been in the garage for a whole 37 seconds
Omg I love winter so much now give me that little tube of wax so my lips don’t bleed all over the snow
So the worst genre is definitely dystopian nonfiction
Me in the group chat after watching the most unhinged 173 message convo erupt all over my phone
Jack is concerned and he just wants you all to know he’s here to help
Dogs are great because they’re basically like 21% Samwise Gamgee, 17% stress ball, 12% Chewbacca, and 50% just happy to be here