lil stinker

i'm always wanting to say shit like "yes sir" and "excellent sir" and "right away sir" that's how you know i'm fully locked in to the butler mindset

crawling under a big weed in the overgrown lot next to a mcdonald's to die.... playing! i'm actually at work! i'm doing my job at work!

butler muscles butler gym routine honed butler toned muscular butler white gloves only

[patting down my pockets as i leave the house] keys, wallet, phone..... shit. [turning to run back inside] i forgot my nibbling cheese. the little block of cheese i keep in my pocket to nibble on. for my anxieties. 👆😂 how many can relate?

[i pick you up in my car and you notice a block of aged cheddar tied with string hanging from the rear view mirror, several little bites taken from it] oh that.... that's just my nibbling cheese... for my anxieties [leans forward to take a bite and veers into oncoming traffic]

丹念に臭くしてます

[small as a little mouse or a bug, to no one in particular] yep, ahaha..... just one of those days ...

replacing the cans of beans in the pantry that i have designated as my "emergency beans" with a couple newer cans of beans. they have officially been retired to "normal eating beans" status.... rest easy soldiers...

did the thing where you pick up the succulent leaves that fell on the ground in the store and pocket them (free, perfectly. legal admired and looked upon as morally good, even) & grow a new succulent from them. don't know when to take off the old rotting leaf though so she stays

carrying all the grocery bags from my car in one trip is probably how it feels for an ant to carry a giant crumb on its back for several ant miles all the way to its colony....

big white t shirt that reaches my ankles with this printed on the front >>>>

had to have a feel....

hatching a freak from an egg... or something of that sort. just one of the various concepts i've concocted...

victorian child posting a picture of their snack plate and it's just lead paint chips and bread that is 90% plaster of paris!!!! i'm playing though!!!!! i just love to joke around!!!!

The perfect snack plate doesn’t exi-

opened this picture on my phone and just looked at it several times today. to keep me grounded.