daisy “dan goose” tackett
@fatstevebuscemi
sturdy broad. comedian. texas-born florida woman. 5x best comedian in jax. same username on everything. alt: @shrimp_liker
before you ever say anything to me please remember that i am super hot, have perfect politics, and have never been wrong a day in my life
the true scam is conservatives convincing you that life, success, happiness, etc., is a zero-sum game.
The left-wing university scam is the next big mis-selling scandal. £290 billion of debt standing on shoulders of young, who default it upon the taxpayer in the end.
i will not be watching jubilee videos because i like myself
indulging in my favorite midnight snack, some apple sauce and a baby bel cheese. or as i call it, the First Grader’s Delight
gifs are a breakthrough in Talking to Parents About Actors. if i had used names this would have taken hours.
currently on a journey to be the most unemployed employed friend
oh and apparently we’re only allowed to critique this insane thought if you were born in 1980-1985.
hard to overstate how much the culture has been shaped by the fact that circa 2011 sites like Jezebel—and, subsequently, the discourse — were overtaken by millennial women with personality disorders and/or intense grudges over the romantic disappointments they suffered as teens
hi everyone i haven’t taken a selfie in a while wanted to remind you how cute i am
i’m going to start carrying a gift for amy sedaris in my bag at all times. you have no idea when you could run into her.
one of my favorite genres of people is straight men who love gossip
INLAND EMPIRE: Shhh, Can you hear it? That pull, a whisper in the dark. There is a place waiting for you, a nexus of fate and doom. It calls to you, draws you in. You should bring a gun to Applebee's
Ryan Gosling and Will Ferrell will star in a new comedy titled ‘TOUGH GUYS’ The film follows 2 goons who are tired of being disposable & break free from the criminal underworld. (Source: Deadline)
Ryan Gosling and Will Ferrell will star in a new comedy titled ‘TOUGH GUYS’ The film follows 2 goons who are tired of being disposable & break free from the criminal underworld. (Source: Deadline)
“I asked ChatGPT” “I asked Grok” okay well I asked my mom and she said no
If I’m into someone I act like I’m into them. If not, I don’t. Unfortunately in 2025 this means I’m really bad at dating
yeah whatever
just remembered that americans don’t have random old castles in the countryside that they can go and visit