Brian Bailey
@brianmbailey77
I do stand up comedy. I also volunteer at the Erie Maritime Museum. I operate a machine to pay the bills.
Schooling really went downhill when parents stopped sending their kids to school with their books bound by a leather strap.
Unpopular opinion on Parenting that would get you in this position
I love punching people in the face. Today, someone actually punched me back. I really, really did not like it. I must be built differently.
We’re porno shop guys, of course we’re going to take advantage of the buy-one, get-one magazine value packs. I’m going with “Man-swallowing MILFS” and “Hirsute Hotties”.
Does she have naturally occurring body hair on her back? Like that other girl who lost Disney $300 million?
“Holy shit, these people are driving like fucking idiots.” say local man, who is driving like a fucking idiot.
I’ve been married for 16 years. I am a mammal, and my wife is a fish. I haven’t had air in 16 years.
Me: Play “My Heart Bleeds for You”! World’s Tiniest Violin Player: I’m sorry, I don’t take requests.
If you had a crazy girlfriend in the 1700’s, she would probably be like “what would happen if I grabbed that cop’s sword?”
🎶🎶🎶They’re eating the dogs The people that came in They’re eating the cats They’re eating the pets of the people that live there 🎶🎶🎶
I’m a little late to the Olympics Opening Ceremony controversy, but I can’t believe the French would openly mock Goatse this way. #Olympic2024 #smellslikefromage
I was at the yacht club this evening for trivia night and they had YouTube videos of boat crashes showing on the big screen.
Man, when Paul Atreides pulls his sunglasses down, looks at the emperor with those deep blue eyes and says, “it’s dibin’ time”, and then “Fight for your Right to Party” starts playing, it just, it just really gets me.
The expERIEnce Children's Museum isn't just for the kiddos anymore. The organization is holding a 21 plus comedy night after finding great success in hosting events for adults in the past. Expect hilarious visiting headliners alongside local talent. eriereader.com/article/experi…
I’m cannot wait to host this awesome show at an awesome place. It’s gonna be great! Everyone should come out. Thanks to @FccErie and the Erie Children’s Museum!
Excited to help out the Erie Children’s Museum! Thursday 2.22
Next show at Black Monk Brewery Saturday Feb 3rd from 7-9. Great line up and FREE! #erie #eriepa #eriecomedy
Talking about the festival and the scene here in Erie, Pa! Join in live tomorrow at 8 am! How to listen is on the graphic.