RandomSprint🧭

Some short stories I wrote in 2025, 🧵

I wonder if the "not this—but that" sentence structure is fundamental to the way LLMs think. They think of words as vectors and notice when they're slipping off course. It's not a crutch—it's a correction, and it's how they think. And I hate it.

Claiming this one

I've seen both of my children build a lot of confidence through athletic success. Night and day difference.

So much software was clearly designed by and for single people. Last night, my daughter was screaming at the Google Home to "show me pictures of Mommy!" and was very frustrated it didn't work.

From what I know about poker, this violates some key strategy. When you get a gun pulled on you and you decide to rob the game, you need to flee the scene immediately. You can't be all loosey-goosey flirting with other livestreamers.

Taking a time machine to the 1970s to tell Mario Andretti about video games. "And the most popular racing game is called Mario Kart!" "Oh, what an honor!" "Well, it's not about you." "Oh, but it was made-a by the Italians?" "You're not going to believe this."

Households eat money and poop empty cardboard boxes.

Is America ready for the return of one-ear Bluetooth headsets?

i wake up. something’s wrong with the clock on the wall. the numbers are jumbled. my hands aren’t right. i tell my wife. she responds: “that’s not just an observation—it’s a powerful insight.” i scream.

At daycare there are two types of children. Some march right into the classroom, happily carrying their backpack. The others cry for five minutes while holding their parent's hand. The parents of the "hard" kids must wonder how the easy children were trained. The parents of the…

My least Catholic belief is that I think if someone makes humans and abandons them, they should be sterilized. Would save a lot of money and heartache in the long run.