Kristi Yamaguccimane
@wapplehouse
backup for @thewapplehouse•𝓐lways 𝓒arry 𝓐 𝓑ible•America’s stepdad•listen to @jortscenterpod•head of Trust and Safety at @twitter
L.L. Bean’s full name was Ladies Love Cool Beans
I’m against eugenics except for anyone that Venmos the Treasury Department
JUST IN - U.S. Treasury Department is now accepting Venmo and PayPal payments from those who want to donate money to reduce the nation's $36.7 trillion debt — NYP
Just copped a ticket to see Weird Al
Just copped a ticket to see Weird Al
Might be the first instance I’ve seen someone fact check him in real time and he clearly doesn’t know how to handle it
Watched EDDINGTON last night and that cute little bear didn’t show up at all
This is legit crazy
Productive afternoon of meetings at the State Department. @StateDept
It rules that this is just a normal headline now
Someone ratted him out
A Chuck E. Cheese employee in full costume was arrested by Tallahassee officers for credit card fraud tallahassee.com/story/news/loc…
go ahead. post another "it’s more expensive to cook at home than eat out take." tell me criticizing Uber Eats is ableist. say it cost $38 to make a hot dog. come up with a woke way to claim buying a taxi for your burrito is revolutionary. call me gay for making my own McFlurry.
This man would call a tow truck driver if he got a flat and had a spare in the trunk
We need more electricians and less sociology majors.
Elon is mentally stuck in 2012 because that’s the last time everyone didn’t think he was cringe
"Adults are embarrassed to eat or be seen eating macaroni and cheese and we're going to change that” is a lie made up whole cloth solely to justify your job existing
I don't talk about my job much but yesterday I dealt with a guy from a company making "Goodles" and I was told "Adults are embarrassed to eat or be seen eating macaroni and cheese and we're going to change that." and I just lost it. Also adults shouldn't say shit like Cheddy Mac
Welcome back Ozzy Osbourne
Trisha Paytas has welcomed her third child, a boy.
You can’t reform this and it’s a diseased American mind that shows any deference to these sons of bitches in blue
Trisha Paytas has welcomed her third child, a boy.
Trisha Paytas has welcomed her third child, a boy.
Every once and a while I’ll have the thought “they can’t possibly still be trotting out Frankie Valli’s unblinking animatronic husk to pretend he still sings” and then he jump scares the fuck outta me on TikTok
🚨BREAKING: Israeli soldier Lenny Shoham was killed this morning in Jabalia after a house collapsed onto her bulldozer during a military operation.
🚨BREAKING: Israeli soldier Lenny Shoham was killed this morning in Jabalia after a house collapsed onto her bulldozer during a military operation.
This is what the subways of NYC will look like if Zohran wins