Tristan Wheeler
@tbone_wheeler
28 year old man @mcsweeneys @PointsinCase. Watch my short films POET LAUREATE & I’M SORRY CODY. Stay tuned for my feature TORONTO APARTMENT he/him
TORONTO APARTMENT, a feature film I wrote, directed and starred in is coming in 2025. Follow @toronto.apartment on Instagram for more details and to join the community
Tristan Wheeler made Poet Laureate at 25 Tristan Wheeler made I’m Sorry Cody at 26 Tristan Wheeler made Toronto Apartment at 27-28
Orson Welles made Citizen Kane at 26 years old PTA made Boogie Nights at 26 Kubrick made Paths of Glory at 26 Ryan Coogler made Fruitvale Station at 26 Chantal Akerman made Jeanne Dielman at 24 Jean-Luc Godard made Breathless at 29
Yes I am
Orson Welles had a very wealthy and privileged background. He had an incredible education and was setup for success. He was given complete artistic free range by RKO and the best writer MGM had on payroll. By no means are you a failure for not making Citizen Kane at 25.
Sean Evans: so Tom, in the 17 years between Gravity's Rainbow and Vineland, you reportedly slunk around Northern California, addicted to TV, sending crank letters to a local newspaper under the name "Wanda Tinasky"-- Thomas Pynchon (choking on NUCLEAR ASS hot sauce): holy fuck
That would be funny if Pynchon surprised everyone and gave a big splash interview for his new book this fall
Talked about my recent reporting on Ontario’s fertility sector on the @TorontoStar’s podcast: This Matters. This is a really good episode! I’m really proud of it! Please listen! thestar.com/podcasts/this-…
You should be able to log a concert on letterboxd so your followers know you didn’t waste valuable movie watching time
the Pittsburgh Pirates shout because they won and in a sense we're all winning we're alive
It would be just my fucking luck if this actually happened to me tomorrow
Imagine looking out your office window and seeing this
Leaving Imagine Cinema’s “Market Square” location in Toronto, Ontario. A Foul Brothel. plumes of vape smoke, unrelenting manipulation of plastic wrappers, an army of swollen lovers smacking lips—A man to my left ventured to strum on his girlfriend’s mingle. Sickening!
I just remembered I sold out 3 years ago when I was on a Food Network show
Jimi Hendrix playing the song from Mario Kart that plays when you win. (Woodstock 1969)
Folsom Prison Blues if it was about wanting a pool: they’re probably on pool floaties And doing cannonballs
I only drink 3 things: black coffee, water, and whatever is in all the different types of alcoholic drinks
He should be from, like a small town in the mountains of British Columbia (still British!) and like I dunno, maybe live in Toronto (more worldly, realistic, calls back to a golden era of James Bond)
The next James Bond should be from Western Canada (but not Alberta)
Amazon’s casting wishlist for who should play the next James Bond includes: • Jacob Elordi • Tom Holland • Harris Dickinson (Source: variety.com/2025/film/news…)
When I was a kid, the concept of a “beer garden” inspired wonder and amazement, but when I grew older I realized it was merely a piece of hot parking lot