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my idgaf era lasts only about 3 seconds and then suddenly im in bed sobbing about everything that has ever happened to me

what is it called when your coping mechanism becomes your entire personality

i wish i could turn my emotions off im tired of feeling everything all at once

im trying to be normal about you but its genuinely killing me

there's a weight in my chest that never really leaves

i dont need meds i just need to be understood

girls who lay in bed convincing themselves they are hard to love before anyone else can

always one step away from everything falling apart

people only like me until they really see me

i get attached like it wont ruin me

please dont turn into another almost

waiting for a sign feels like waiting to die

how do i let people in without expecting them to leave

everyone i get close to eventually disappears

i wish i could let go of the things that keep me up at night without needing to understand why

i want to be held and adored and cherished and feel cared for and loved and safe and seen and like i matter

i miss when i didnt have to think about the consequences to my actions all the time

fantasizing about being understood by someone who doesnt even care about my existence

my hobbies include overthinking, self sabotaging, disassociating in public, making playlists and pretending everything is fine