McSweeney's
@mcsweeneys
The official feed of McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, & McSweeney's Books. Publisher of @illustoria and @believermag.
Camp Gin & Tonic Camp Sleeping ’Til 8 Camp Finally Finishing "Gone Girl" Camp Wow, These Edibles Are a Lot Stronger Than the Pot We Used to Smoke in College mcsweeneys.net/articles/summe…
"Some movies are called 'films,' which happens if the movie is too long, is very boring, or was directed by someone who married their own adopted daughter." mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-lov…
"If you’re going to pick a fight, pick one with the ellipsis… that slithering bitch has been freelancing since modernism. Better yet, try the semicolon; he gets off on the attention." mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-am-…
"Millennials want their kids to relive their 1990s summers, but that won’t cut it... I want to go back even farther, to a decade when parents didn’t put trackers on their children’s phones and women couldn’t vote." mcsweeneys.net/articles/im-gi…
Ever wonder how your fitness regimen would change after the apocalypse? Well, @joshgondelman has you covered. mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-a…
"Anne was smart for a woman. She was almost as smart as men. However, she was not given the teaching position near her home. Anne did not cry." mcsweeneys.net/articles/anne-…
"All the years of acting classes and auditioning have finally paid off." mcsweeneys.net/articles/pleas…
Would you rather identify with Holden Caulfield or marry someone who still identifies with Holden Caulfield? mcsweeneys.net/articles/twent…
"Execute an obvious pump-and-dump scam with crypto coin called $BRUH or $BOOBS or something." mcsweeneys.net/articles/democ…
"Europe has better restaurants than the United States. Nobody cooks at home in Europe, because there are so many fun restaurants. Dining out is more affordable in Europe because everyone uses their dad’s credit card." mcsweeneys.net/articles/life-…
“I’ve compiled a list of seventeen articles on perimenopause that you might find interesting.” mcsweeneys.net/articles/your-…
"The president, tiptoeing precipitously down the sidelines of legality, inadvertently ran the constitutional football out of bounds." mcsweeneys.net/articles/new-y…
"Noel and Liam learned their psychological warfare skills from Davis, who woke them up every morning by saying, 'You’ll never play footy for Man City.'" mcsweeneys.net/articles/catch…
"By the way, how is Carl Sagan doing?" mcsweeneys.net/articles/this-…
"Hey, your partner called us. Wow. Skateboarding? Right now, at this point in your life? Recreationally? No! Why do you insist on wading into the waters of the Unknown when the safe shores of Life have been given to you by people who love you?" mcsweeneys.net/articles/you-r…
"A man attempts to chum using sustainable ingredients. He says he is 'reimagining blood.' The fish do not bite. A friend says he has lost the thread. There is an argument. The episode ends with the bucket washing ashore." mcsweeneys.net/articles/ernes…
"To be clear, we’re not anti-soap. But given the skyrocketing rate of chronic illness in this country, isn’t it worth investigating if soap plays a role?" mcsweeneys.net/articles/autho…
"I am 133 years old, and I retain my appearance of an old lady’s elbow skin stretched taut over an adult human skull. It’s called 'peak physical condition.'" mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-a…
"Other water parks were not giving Uncle Rick the fix he needed with their SAFETY REGULATIONS AND DEARTH OF COCAINE-FUELED WATER RIDES, so the big man set out to DISRUPT BOTH THE WATER SLIDE AND COCAINE INDUSTRIES." mcsweeneys.net/articles/plann…
"Can I just say that I am heartened to see that my book enjoys an average star rating of 3.50? That’s pretty darn great, and I’m pleased as mead." mcsweeneys.net/articles/my-na…
