Magachurch Pastor馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
@magachrchpastr
Saved Christmas from the Radical Left. Harlan Crow is my uncle. Can spot an Antifa a mile away. PragerU: Summa Cum Laude. Inventor of the pastoral side-hug.
OBAMA DID IT! I'm not quite sure what, but that lady with two colors of hair finally found the memos we had during the first Trump administration. I'm so worked up I almost forgot about Pres Trump's numerous round-trips on Epstein's pedo plane!!馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
When this brother came in sowing seeds of division, I responded back with a harvest of righteousness 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
The stage at church is tastefully decorated, and I'm excited for my sermon today from Matthew's Gospel entitled, "Obama Did It". It's going to be a great day! Invite a friend!! 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
Little did Marie know, before blocking me she actually WAS entertaining me 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
Pres Trump is suing the WSJ for $20 billion for saying he drew a doodle on a birthday card to his friend, Epstein. How can his lawyers put such a woeful valuation on his pristine reputation after all he's done for Christianity? He might have a case for libel AND malpractice!馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
A lot of people think I want their money. I don鈥檛. I want their love. Money is just the easiest way they can show how much they love me 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
Why am I so successful? Partly because I attended a 2-year Bible College (unaccredited) in Missouri. I literally have all the answers. Relationships? Geology? Human sexuality? Obama? Vaccines? There's a double-sided Word doc for any issue in a binder on my shelf! #Wisdom 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
The most important thing when dealing with your online critics is to maintain a laser-like focus on your mission. I have a feeling this dear brother (redacted) is going to be joining me in ministry very soon!! 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
THANK YOU for your generous donations!! Because of YOU we were finally able to have this hand-painted mural added to EACH classroom wall in our Children's area (KidZone). Our precious little ones were THRILLED to see Pres Trump with John Wayne, and also Jesus 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
One year ago today Pres Trump was felled by a murderous shard of plastic to the ear. He coded, followed the light, went to heaven for 4 minutes, and then returned to earth to save our country from migrant avocado farmers because as vegetables go, he鈥檚 more of a ketchup guy馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
鈥硷笍FLASH SALE鈥硷笍 Everyone who becomes a generous recurring giver to my ministry TODAY will be automatically entered into a drawing for a VIP spot in our "Parking Lot of America" (formerly the South Lot). See you at church. Bring a friend!! 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
Some of my Assistant Pastors got a little excited about my upcoming sermon and started showing it off in the church parking lot. Hopefully it will be on my assistant Pam鈥檚 desk when I go looking for it on Sunday morning 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
Jimmy Swaggart's funeral will be this weekend, ten days after his sudden and unexpected passing at the age of 90. This is more than ample time for the coroner to answer the simple question on everyone's mind, including my own: "Was it because he was vaxxed?" 馃檹馃嚭馃嚫
