hourlyscopes

pisces, manifest something random and weird today

capricorn, your sleep schedule is fiction

scorpio, you’ve been too quiet and it’s concerning

libra, your style makes people feel underdressed

cancer, over-apologize and then get annoyed

taurus, try something new and overthink it immediately

gemini, argue with yourself in the mirror

leo, your energy is legally chaotic

virgo, rearrange your desk at midnight

sagittarius, tell a weird story like it’s normal

aries, commit to the bit

aquarius, randomly clap and confuse the room

pisces, you’re three emotions away from enlightenment

capricorn, organize your week and ignore your plan

scorpio, look someone in the eye and scare them slightly

libra, laugh like everything’s fine

cancer, rehearse a fake interview in the shower

taurus, talk in song lyrics for an hour

gemini, your internet search history is unhinged

leo, narrate your walk like it’s a documentary