Sanjeev Kohli

🎶 Oh she may get weary Young girls they do get weary Staying in that same old guest house in Skegness But when she gets weary Try a little Inverness 🎶

If you lose your case in The Supreme Court, it is still possible to make an appeal to The Court of Diana Ross

Going to the Half Rewind festival next weekend. Looking forward to seeing Duran, Talk & Mister. Hopefully catch Wet and a Half as well

I never had a Samsung Galaxy. I preferred the more basic Samsaid Boost

Belinda Carlisle & me? We dream the same dreams, we want the same things. She keeps outbidding me on eBay

Another fantastic day at Glasgow Queen Street with @ScotRail’s strategic partner, @RSNO. We support their annual Christmas Concerts including The Snowman, and we were lucky enough to find this year’s narrator in the station too. Thanks for getting a photo with us @govindajeggy!

Come join me on Bluesky. @govindajeggy.bskyb.social. The water’s lovely. (And I don’t know if you’ve noticed yet but there’s a massive skittery turd in your shallow end)

That’s me on the Bluesky. @govindajeggy.bskyb.social. I am consciously uncoupling from Elon Musk. Which will make things VERY awkward when I see him at the climbing wall we both frequent

The golden age of boat rescue was probably the seventies. Of course that was when flares were fashionable

I wouldn't say Jet Set Willie was completely ZX, but he was certainly on the ZX Spectrum

I do my lounging in my lounge, my boxing in my box room & my panicking in my panic room

I just got third party insurance. I'm going to have to be REALLY, REALLY careful at the next two parties I go to.

If you're looking for trouble... you've come to the wrong place. He's the guy at no 32 with the car engine on a burnt-out mattress

Will.i.am has a sister Gill.i.an who’s brill.i.ant at bill.i.ards

Yoyo Dieter is a fair description of my erratic eating habits. It also happens to be my German hiphop name

The next 4 years will be a mash-up of King Ralph & The Omen III #Trump #America

Thankyou so much to @elbimbo4321 for making this wee guy. I’m now on the lookout for a teeny tiny Curly Wurly

If you want to be picked for Trump's presidential team, better hit the gym now cos there's going to be a swimsuit round

To be fair to Americans, every 8 years I put an entire roll of tinfoil in a microwave & expect a different outcome