Dr. Dave
@drdave1999
Psychologist. Author. College Professor. Media Commentator. Private School Owner. Wow, that sounds exhausting. #TheResistance #MAGAtsBlocked
Ghislaine Maxwell will obviously say what she’s being coached to say: Trump barely knew Epstein, never visited the island, and never touched a kid. In exchange, she’ll be released from prison. Within a year, she’ll die under mysterious circumstances. You can bet on it.
Donald Trump is the most prolific, compulsive, incorrigible liar who ever lived. He’s told nearly 100,000 lies while in office. He was Jeffrey Epstein’s best friend for more than a decade, and visited the island repeatedly— but he never raped any kids while he was there, right?
Trump: I had nothing to do with the guy. Q: He was at your wedding!! You were his best friend for over a decade!! He flew you to his island— on his private jet— 7 times!! Trump: I think he served me coffee once— he and his secretary, what was her name? Jizzlane, I think it was.
MAGA: We don’t wanna live in an America where people don’t have freedom— freedom to avoid education, freedom to own assault weapons and massacre crowds, freedom to hate anyone who looks, sounds, or thinks differently, and freedom to visit a friend’s island to rape children.
Newsmax: Whenever there’s a rape trial, the man is a victim, too. He has to sit in court as evidence is presented that’s clearly designed to embarrass him, and he’s not even permitted to jump to his feet and yell, “You lying wench! You know you wanted it!”
Q: If Ghislaine Maxwell claims that Trump is innocent, we can believe her, right? She has real credibility? A: Sure. Why would anyone doubt a person who’d be released from prison in exchange for lying, and is guilty of being both a pedophile and a pimp? apple.news/AVoQcWqzARVCvt…
Trump: Women are averaging just 1.6 kids each? That is very concerning. Aide: Why is that, sir? Trump: There may not be an ample supply of 12-year-olds girls to suit my needs. We may have to ask other Republicans to hold back a little and save some for their favorite President.
I predict that Trump will soon want to replace the inscription on the Statue of Liberty. Currently: Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. New: Give me your 12-year-old daughter or I’ll have ICE deport you to Afghanistan.
GOP: The Epstein files are becoming the biggest crisis this administration has ever faced. What are you planning to do about it? Trump: I’m gonna put an 80% tariff on them. GOP: That doesn’t make any sense at all. Trump: Are you sure? GOP: Yes, 1200%.
Hey, MAGAts! Don’t you hate it when you elect someone because she’s a duplicitous, lying seditionist— and then she turns out to be so fu*king stupid that she’d actually trust Donald Trump?!!!
Trump, as Commander-in-chief: General: Sir, we’ve suffered serious losses— 49% of our bombers and 51% of our fighters have already been damaged or destroyed. Trump: Thank goodness that still leaves 800% of them airworthy.
Earth’s most famous pimp, Ghislaine Maxwell, is meeting with the corrupt Deputy AG. Blanche: The President will clear you, if you’ll clear him. GM: I’ll swear he was never on the island. Blanche: You must say no Republicans ever were— only Democrats. apple.news/AynWkXRFYS66GL…
Republican Party policy: Whether you voted for us or not, we’ll abuse your kids if we get the chance. We’re all deviant sex criminals, and as our leader, Donald Trump, often says, ‘Who needs a whole island just to have some fun with minors?!!’
Trump: In the 2024 election, I won with 287% of the popular vote. No one’s ever seen numbers like that before. Wharton: Except your classmates back in ‘Basic Macroeconomics.’ Some of them are still traumatized.
Trump: From now on, I think artificial intelligence should be called Lester.
Q: Should America be worried about having a President who has no idea whatsoever what a percentage is? A: Of course. There’s an 86% chance that Trump will damage the U.S. economy irreparably, and there’s a 38% chance of that.