Cranston

I’m sick of holding my horses they deserve to run free and kick people to death

telling all my coworkers that i think they’re so brave

damn shawty that’s a lot of sick days

i have so many troubles and even a few difficulties

sniffing the perfumes at the department store so aggressively they ask me to leave

sorry i can’t make it my girlfriends doing experiments on me again

what’s a beginner substance for someone just getting into ruining their life

if i worked in an office i would cover my cubicle walls with photos of my coworkers families

Why does SpongeBob even hang out with Squidward given his reputation

The moon speaks in a very soft voice so you have to listen carefully

ever since i set your boat on fire you’ve been so distant

hahaha good one bro can i put my fingers in your mouth

i didn’t ask to be born in fact i specifically requested not to be

you can learn a lot about someone by hiding under their bed for several weeks

I’m like if a broken printer was a person

did you seriously just pique my interest

can i come over and fold your toilet paper into little triangles

I’m definitely the most fuckable person at this intervention

sorry i was late i was throwing rocks at cars

i’d do anything for her (the moon)

i’m like if a computer error was a person