Mark Twain
@TheMarkTwain
It is not best that we should all think alike; it is a difference of opinion that makes horse races.
When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.
We Americans... bear the ark of liberties of the world.
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
I've never let my school interfere with my education.
Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.
In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
To refuse awards is another way of accepting them with more noise than is normal.
Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.