Juulius

Never kill yourself

Asking to put your number in her phone and then just cashapping yourself 50$ >>>

You know your fit hard when you get randomly selected at the airport

Rehab would never work on such an ambitious gentleman such as myself

I can tell if someone is Chinese just by looking at them

I don’t know how to act

97 year old brothel still serves its pussy the old fashioned way

Once i get a twitter badge im switching up on all my day ones

If you think 115 in a 45 was impressive officer wait until you see what I’m about to blow into that breathalyzer

I paid 600$ for custom pants that don’t look any different to the naked eye if you piss them

Undercooked chicken can’t hurt you if you’re pure of heart

I have to sleep standing up or the fluid in my lungs will kill me

I spend an hour a day in the sauna as tolerance training for eternity in hell

I got a prostate exam once and nutted so hard they trespassed me from the urgicare

We’re bringing knives to a gun fight at my place later if you want to pull up

Just paid a homeless lady 50$ for a footjob

Bad day to be a touch tunes

When i walk into the liquor store they already got my shit rung up and bagged