Sandford Police Comms
@Sandford_Police
England’s smallest Police Farce, committed to catching crinimals & a swan. Don’t report crime. Emergency? Yes📞999 | No📞101 (PARODY/SATIRE) #TheGreaterGood
There is a lot of misinformation out there on the internet Detective Inspector Iva Biggun advises “Please do your research, look at bios/profiles, verify information & don’t just blindly think what you’re reading is true” Together we can beat the scammers & those intent on…
Sorry for bussing people in for the counter protest at Epping Seemed like a good idea at the time How were we to know it might not end that well 🤷🏻♂️
We have a number of large strap ons if she wants to come with us
“I’d much rather see a great big, strapping male police officer with a female [police officer]” Reform leader Nigel Farage says he’d recruit a “physically tougher” standard of police officer. His MP for Runcorn and Helsby, Sarah Pochin, says female officers should be deployed…
We think this is overdue All should have a Cycle Unique Numbering Tag
RIP Ozzy Osbourne Thoughts with his family, friends and bandmates
People do some fucking horrendous things in the name of “religion”
Re Mr Farage idea to sentence people committing their 3rd offence to a “life term” Is that a good idea? Any other suggestions!
What about regular foreskins?
Fantastic Four skins are coming to Fortnite this Friday
youdonothavetosayanythingbutitmayharmyourdefenceifyoudonotmentionnowsomethingthatyoulaterrelyonincourtanythingyoudosaymaybegiveninevidence
Our campaign to #BreakTheMonopoly relaunches via @CrowdJusticeUK this afternoon at 1500hrs. Until then read about the action we have taken so far. 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻 solicitorsjournal.com/sjarticle/poli…
Just a reminder that no matter how bad things seem to get, they can always get worse
Mrs Brown’s Boys returns for its first series in two years on Friday, August 1st, airing at 9:30pm on BBC One!
Someone will call 999 or present at A&E claiming “I was walking around my house naked and accidentally slipped and landed on it”
In the UK this will end up stuck in someone’s arse
Sunday. The Lords Day A day of rest and reflection We will be resting today, please do not call us unless it involves cakes
In the UK this will end up stuck in someone’s arse
Japanese design firm Kenji Abe has designed a glass beer bottle that you can stick into the sand on the beach
Absofuckinglutely
Majority back £100 fines for public swearing Polling suggests 54% of Brits support £100 fines for foul language in public. Supporters say it’s about restoring respect, while critics call it a unenforceable waste of resources. Is this common sense, or a massive overreach?
Please be advised the roads are a bit moist today If you are driving, please slow down, increase gaps, no harsh acceleration or braking No phones No masturbating
Please join us. We are accepting transfers from The Mets Police to @Sandford_Police
Anyone who can transfer to a county or the NCA will do. Firearms, surveillance, people who'd rather patrol Sandford than Brixton. Anyone who has a card to play will play it.