The Hard Times

@REALpunknews

Real punk news, comin’ your way! We are reader supported, if you want to join the community sign up for our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thehardtimes

Satire

Joined December 2014

573Following

107KFollowers

The Hard Times@REALpunknews · 1 h

Millennial Woman Who Starts and Ends Each Day With 3 Hours of Screen Time Really Into Mindfulness, Self-Care thehardtimes.net/culture/millen…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Local 34-year-old Meris Johnson reportedly stares at her phone for hours at a time in the morning and evening despite constantly championing her mindfulness and self-care routine.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · 3 h

In Light of Stephen Colbert’s Politically Motivated Cancellation I’m Taking a Stand and Unsubscribing From Paramount Plus as Soon as “Dexter: Resurrection” Wraps up and I Watch “Pet Semetary 2” and a Couple Other Movies thehardtimes.net/blog/in-light-…

REALpunknews's tweet card. For those of you not aware, CBS has just cancelled “The Late Show” a show that has been one of the most-watched late night shows since it first aired 32 years ago. The network claims this is a...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · 5 h

Sharon Osbourne Says Ozzy Still Has 10–20 Good Shows Left in Him thehardtimes.net/music/sharon-o…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Sharon Osbourne believes that her recently deceased husband Ozzy Osbourne still has enough juice in the tank to keep touring and performing for at least another year.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · 7 h

Children Starving in Gaza Wish Trump Would Use Them to Distract from Epstein Scandal thehardtimes.net/culture/childr…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Malnourished children living in increasingly dire conditions in Gaza expressed disappointment Monday that President Donald Trump has yet to exploit their suffering as a distraction from the wave of...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · 9 h

GWAR Concert Goes Viral After CEO of Tech Start Up Caught Having Affair on Analingus Cam thehardtimes.net/music/gwar-con…

REALpunknews's tweet card. BOSTON — Viral footage from GWAR’s popular Analingus Cam supposedly shows a tech CEO engaged in a lewd sexual act with his mistress, multiple people…

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 22

Punk Guitarist Gets Pre-Denial Offer From Credit Card Company thehardtimes.net/culture/punk-g…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Baxter Lenin, guitarist for Ketamine Chainsaw, recently received a “pre-denial offer” in the mail from Capital One.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 22

Rock and Roll Lifestyle Finally Catches Up To Ozzy Osbourne, 76 thehardtimes.net/culture/rock-a…

REALpunknews's tweet card. LOS ANGELES — Decades of hard partying and wild nights finally caught up to legendary metal musician Ozzy Osbourne who died at the young age…

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 22

New MLK Jr. Files Show the Civil Rights Leader Considered President Trump A Close Personal Friend With No Ties to Jeffrey Epstein thehardtimes.net/culture/new-ml…

REALpunknews's tweet card. The Trump administration ordered a trove of new documents related to the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr., which contains new information about Trump’s personal influence on the civil rights...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 22

Five Tips for Practicing Mindfulness as the Mushroom Cloud Grows in the Distance thehardtimes.net/blog/five-tips…

REALpunknews's tweet card. It's no secret that modern life can be profoundly anxiety-inducing. From the rising cost of living to maintaining relationships, one can easily forget how to find their center and practice self-care....

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 22

Battle Vest Passes “Drunk Old Metalhead Guy Outside of Venue” Inspection thehardtimes.net/music/battle-v…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Local show attendee Alicia Zewbrowski appeared to have narrowly passed a visual inspection of her battle vest conducted by an older, drunken metalhead while minding her own business outside of the...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 21

Domestic Abuser Charged with Impersonating Police Officer thehardtimes.net/culture/domest…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Local piece of shit Jesse Schweitzer was charged with impersonating a police officer after assaulting his entrapped girlfriend Denise Soderstrom.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 21

If You’re Interested in Joining My Christian Metal Band, You Must Have an Unwavering Commitment to Christ And/or Know How To Play Drums and Have Your Own Kit thehardtimes.net/blog/if-youre-…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Hey man, thanks for answering my Craigslist ad. The guys are super excited to jam with you. Just one thing, though: I may not have mentioned the specific type of metal that we play. Unlike most bands...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 21

Leftist Who Actually Knows Stuff About Guns Suddenly Real Popular in Friend Group thehardtimes.net/culture/leftis…

REALpunknews's tweet card. WeHo-based firearms enthusiast Dave Simpson recently saw a drastic uptick in popularity amongst his left-of-center friends.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 21

Attorney General Pam Bondi Drops Ukulele Apology Video thehardtimes.net/culture/attorn…

REALpunknews's tweet card. US Attorney General Pam Bondi responded to scathing public inquiry regarding the so-called Epstein client list by posting a video of her singing and playing the ukulele.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 20

Chronic Mansplainer Puts “Storyteller” in Instagram Bio thehardtimes.net/culture/chroni…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Local 37-year-old man Dan Dweyer recently added the word “storyteller” to his Instagram bio despite frequently engaging in the conversational technique known as mansplaining.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 20

The Movie “Her” Didn’t Prepare Me for How Much My AI Girlfriend Would Mention White Genocide thehardtimes.net/blog/the-movie…

REALpunknews's tweet card. I’ve never been great with human people. Maybe that’s why when Spike Jonze released his film “Her” back in 2013, my budding young incel brain swirled with possibility. The idea of taking the human...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 20

Fabric of Reality Begins to Unravel After Punk Band Starts Show on Time thehardtimes.net/music/fabric-o…

REALpunknews's tweet card. The very fabric of space and time which holds the universe together began to unravel after punk band Torch Failure began their set at the exact time they were billed to perform.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 19

Study Confirms There’s Nothing Cool About Drugs Except for All the Cool Stuff You’ll See, Hear, and Feel thehardtimes.net/culture/study-…

REALpunknews's tweet card. A recent study out of Johns Hopkins confirms there’s absolutely nothing cool about drugs, except for all the cool stuff you’ll see, hear, and feel.

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 19

Okay, I Admit It: The Fyre Festival Cheese Sandwich Was the Most Delicious Meal I’ve Ever Had thehardtimes.net/blog/okay-i-ad…

REALpunknews's tweet card. It’s time to come clean once and for all. The best meal I’ve ever had was the two slices of limp cheese between a couple of slices of Wonder bread at the Fyre Festival in 2017. It was so good it left...

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The Hard Times@REALpunknews · Jul 19

Poser Black Metal Musician Has Sense of Humor thehardtimes.net/music/poser-bl…

REALpunknews's tweet card. Scott Griffith, vocalist and guitarist for black metal band Skogklage, showed himself to be a total poser when it was revealed that he has a sense of humor.

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