hog water backwoods rat person

being evil rn don’t text. or do, if you like evil bitches.

no no no…god granted YOU the serenity to accept the things you cannot change…god granted ME the swag (OCD) to change all things if i do Enough Rituals…

oh this is so twilight

i wanna do some tarot readings today if any of yall are interested i’ve got time 👼🏻

just ate 4 airheads in rapid succession and i can feel my internal organs shutting down

my toxic trait is that i love emails. i love getting emails

[Trying to flirt] I had several dreams about you. None of them good, very ambiguous actually. But hopefully this means something.

*gulps* experience the what

i'm 5'4" so my coworkers can't stop lathering me up in lithium grease and throwing me down various chutes and vents

one thing about me is i am always eating a fucking popsicle

Is this anything #panictwt

Man wish I could find the piece but there was this painting I saw like 8 years ago, something to the effect of "I'm always waiting for water to boil". It was kind of in the style of a children's drawing and it had someone staring at their reflection in a kettle

kinda love when the other apprentices ask me to take the trash out at the end of the night it makes me feel soooo butch like of course i’ll handle the trash for you queen don’t even worry about it

gotta fart a lot of times rn but i have 3 hours left of work. saving them all for my wife. going to blast us into outer space

i………was 20………

shes so polite with it now…. cannot believe this is also her eating honey