Gori the Warlock
@Gori_Grindelfig
Gori Grindelfig, son of Dori Grindelfig. Blacksmith, Chef, and Warlock. I enjoy a hard days work and a tall pint of ale. Favorite human: @Katano426
Is this the blue redemption arc? No, it could never be.
Hey guys, Bimble here! And this is bad, real bad
I'm at this awesome party the Aesir are throwing and everyone is having this competition to see if they can harm Baldr. Bimble is up next, some guy in a hood gave me arrows made from some funny plant lol. Imagine if this actually works
"Hey, I want a flesh golem , but with no unethically sourced parts" "No unethically sourced parts?" "And hold the souls of the damned!" "No souls of the damned? Hey Jimmy give me a golem with NOTHIN'"
Someone needs to make a mold mucus spell. Think there's a lot of potential in that one.
Ring of Favor and Protection
None of us at the office can work this one out, does anyone know? #TrickyBrainTeaser
Feel like putting a ninja warrior course in my home to keep adventures out. Should I put in lava traps or acid traps? I am curious which one is easier to maintain.
Medieval farmer who’s cleaning their farm animals: “my goat is washed”
The gods decided to curse me with a hearty appetite, lest my form be too appealing to the fairer sex, but jokes on them im built like Shrek and some ladies are into that!
Hit a warg with my broom today when I was going to get some groceries, fml dude.
going to the fortune teller and u pick one of the tarot cards. its The Pervert. u ask if thats good and the fortune teller is like nope ive never seen that one before either
going to the fortune teller and u pick one of the tarot cards. its The Pervert. u ask if thats good and the fortune teller is like nope ive never seen that one before either
Guards! Kill this thing!
WRONG WRONG WRONG! it's "i do regret that i said 'huzzah' when thou removedst thy pants. dost thou yet find me fair?" or (probably less accurately) "i do regret that i said 'huzzah' upon removal of thy pants. findst thou that i am yet fair?"
Bandit: *tying me up* Mineself: *moans* The little goblin: running by our feet Bandit: holy shit did you see that
I am going to kill Greg's friend.
Me: Hey can I change the radio? Friend: No you’re just going to play dwarven covers of classic rock songs again! Me: (lying) I promise I wont this time. *changes the station* The Radio: 🎵Dwarves built this fortress, Dwarves built this fortress with rock and stone🎵
“In Orc City, they’re eating the dwarves, the orcs that came in, they’re eating the elves, they’re eating the slaves of the orcs that live there.”
Honestly, I think the orcs deserved it. I stand with the elves on this one.
I should unleash a few adolescent dragons into a guard's parking lot. Let's see them try to chase after me when their cars are all bloated.
Being magically attuned sucks sometimes. Hit my toe on the cast iron brazier I keep in my living room and started cursing my furniture on accident.