ExWHUCanteenEmployee

ITK means in the kitchen if I ever use it btw…just to avoid any confusion

Grealish and the associated baggage (delishious pints) are what we need badly around the club. Since Nolan left nobody has joined me for a 7am “starter off-er” Get it done @karren_brady

Anyone got some ID I can borrow for some research I’m doing on Sullivan’s back catalogue on pornhub?

8/10. Good come on you irons

Coldplay concerts are weird

I’m happier winning a quid on a scratchy

(1) new message from Malick 📩

EXCLUSIVE TRANSFER UPDATE Found behind the canteen bog this morning

Got a bet with Paqueta on him being acquitted. No money involved as we’re both skint but there is a forfeit for the loser. Spend a night in a house of horrors aka Ampika’s care home

Fuck you Sullivan

Kudus walking into his first Spurs training after royal rumbling the entire squad last season

Not me 🙋‍♂️

Not reporting to Rush Green: me. Got pissed yesterday and sacked off work today

11% need therapy

I genuinely don’t care if Kudus goes to spurs. I’m so emotionally detached from West Ham atm. Something like this would have boiled my piss 5 years ago but now it gets a shoulder shrug.

What do you guys think of the new Home kit?

That's not me. AI generated chef with less jowls

Look @WestHam @karren_brady I was daft enough to renew but I didn’t expect you to barrage me with a million texts and emails to buy more season tickets (bypassing the famous “waiting list”) You’ve managed to piss me off before a ball is kicked as I expect the bowl will be empty

Key date of signing a half decent player is.......

This is who runs this account