Danke chains
@DANKCHAINS
Like the German for thank you with much more DANK... you.
I love this time of year. Sunshine, birds chirping, the Lime scooter tree in full bloom.
With reports that as much as 95% of the FBI’s resources have been diverted to immigration, a long sleeping dragon is now free to wake from its slumber.
If you have to brainstorm tattoos to get, you shouldn’t get a tattoo.
In honor of Ozzy Osborne’s passing, I present the greatest edit in documentary film history.
I appreciate the art in this ad because it highlights that rare moment in life when you’ve been physically ejected from a convertible but your friend is nice enough to offer you a smoke on your way out.
I wonder if my former FBI agent misses my shitposts while he sits in Home Depot parking lots looking for migrant gardeners.
It’s really a shame when you think about it, but dogs would be so fucking good at doing cocaine.
John Oliver looks like a racist character of British people the Germans would have put out in WWII.
Me on this hellsite, furiously blocking slop/porn/bot accounts.
Alfred from HR: It appears you haven’t completed the required training. Failure to do so… Me:
I’ve tried absolutely nothing to fix my problems and I’m all out of options.
“Bitch-at”? Jack I don’t need an app for that, I’ll just call my wife!
Jack Dorsey unveils “Bitchat,” a new Bluetooth-based messaging app. No Wi-Fi. No cell service. Messages hop peer-to-peer, up to 300 meters. Fully end-to-end encrypted.
There’s a special place in hell reserved for White House press secretaries.
In second grade this kid said “cool hat” to me sarcastically and I haven’t worn one since. I’m 35
Wait what? World renowned chair critic, “Renée” said that? Well fuck me sideways, I’ll take two!
